The Boots Of Christmas Past
by luvcali76
Summary: Co written with Zenkindoflove. A Jackie and Hyde Christmas story. One shot.


**The Boots Of Christmas Past**

**A/N:** Co-written with Zenkindoflove. A Jackie and Hyde Christmas Story. Please review, and have yourselves a good holiday season.

* * *

**Christmas Eve, 1981**

'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the… Oh, who am I kidding? I have not a literary bone in my, uh, leather. Yeah, that's right; I said leather. Fine, maybe not leather… synthesized vinyl. Whatever. I was made in the '70s and sold at a freaking mall in Point Place, Wisconsin. What do you expect? If you must know, I am barely holding it together these days. My vinyl is worn down to the toe, my left heel is hanging on by a small strip of Crazy Glue, and I used to be a pretty cool shade of bronzed tan, but now, I think I'm more the color of my owner's cheapest, watered-down beer. And why not? Enough of it has been spilled on me over the years!

Let me introduce myself. My name is _My Boots_. Clever, huh? Yeah. My owner gave me this bad ass name. _Where are My Boots? Thanks for My Boots. Shine My Boots, small grasshopper._ That's right. There was a time when I was shine-worthy. The chicks, they totally dug me. These days, though, all I seem to be doing is causing trouble, especially between my owner and his chick, _my_ financier, Jackie.

Speak of the devil, as Forman might say; here that brunette Goddess comes now. Heavenly, isn't she…

"_Steven!"_ Jackie practically screeched, her voice reaching that level of shrill that made Hyde cringe and wrestle the urge to gag the woman he loved. Her oven mitt covered hands landed right on her hips. Her left foot tapped. "Tell me you did_ not_ just take off those ratty, _muddy_ boots on my new rug!"

Hyde looked down at his feet. Beside them were the boots she had tried to bribe him with in the eleventh grade, the ones he had just slipped off after shoveling snow. Mud and melting ice surrounded them. The rug was a mess. And _he_ was in deep shit.

Stifling a smile, Hyde looked up. "Yeah, sorry about that."

"You're sorry?" Jackie repeated angrily and looked around in exasperation. "I've got fifteen people coming over in," she checked the clock above the kitchen door, "thirty-five minutes! The house is a mess! I can't find the silver set my mother gave me! And the food isn't done! 'Cause it's not like _you_ offered to help cook or anything!"

Hyde's expression hardened. "I was shoveling the freakin' driveway, Jackie, so that those fifteen people that you invited to the party_, that I said no to_, can park!"

"Yeah, well, now you're all sweaty and my rug is ruined!"

"Oh God," Hyde sneered. "Stop being so dramatic, Jackie. It's not ruined."

"And didn't I tell you to throw out those ratty old boots like six months ago?" she added for the simple sake of escalation. "You look like an indigent!" Finished, Jackie turned on her heel and headed back toward the stove.

Hyde followed. "Hey! I'll get rid of them when _I_ feel like it."

Turning back around, Jackie narrowed her eyes. "I said…Throw them _out_."

Hyde folded his arms. "No."

"Steven."

"Get bent."

Jackie gasped. "Well you can just forget about Christmas sex tonight, Mister!" she shouted and stormed past him out of the kitchen.

"Fine! I didn't want it anyway!"

Hyde shoved his boots back over his wet socks and headed for the side door again, slamming it shut.

Man, those two. Not but a year, and already they seem to have lost their Christmas spirit. But you have to understand Steven and his chick; they have been through a lot together, and let me just say that I have been there every step of the way, through the good, the bad, and the _Holy crap! He did that?_ In fact, you could say that it was _I_, My Boots, who stepped in to save those two stubborn fools from themselves one cold, snowy Christmas Eve…

**Christmas Eve, December 24, 1980**

**One Year Before**

Hyde's boots sunk into the frosty snow as he walked away from his El Camino and marched up the driveway to the Formans' house. He had just gotten off work and decided to stop by before heading back to his apartment for the night. The snow crunched beneath his feet and he began to feel coldness nipping at his toes. He just chose to ignore the fact that his favorite pair of boots were beginning to wither away. He had worn them every day since Jackie bought them for him, and he would be damned if he was going to let a hole or two and a few frostbitten toes make him throw them away now. He silently assured himself that the fact Jackie, his ex, had given them to him had nothing to do with his stubbornness. He just didn't see the point in giving up on them so soon. As long as they could cover most of his feet, then they were sticking around.

Hyde closed the sliding glass door behind him as he entered the kitchen and quickly rubbed his hands together so that Mrs. Forman, who appeared to be making her famous Christmas cookies, wouldn't see him trying to warm himself up. For some reason, during the holidays her gene that coded her to be the over protective and diligently concerned mother turned itself all the way up. She was always getting onto Hyde about dressing properly during the winter and would fuss over him for hours because he never wore gloves. So, he had to be extra covert if he wanted to sneak past her unscathed.

Hyde turned around and greeted Mrs. Forman with a kiss on the cheek. "Those cookies look really good."

"Well, you can't have any until our Christmas Eve dinner tonight, so hands off mister for just a few more hours."

Hyde frowned down at the warm gingerbread men and sugar cookies dusted with green sprinkles. "Well, I'll be down in the basement."

Hyde was almost at the door when Kitty called after him.

"Steven, is that a hole in your boots?"

_Damn it_, Hyde cursed to himself. He was almost a free man.

"Uhhhh," Hyde tried to quickly think of a convincing lie, "No?"

Kitty rolled her eyes and threw her hands in the air. "That's it! You're going to mall right now and buying a new pair."

A chord of panic struck across Hyde's face. He rushed over to the kitchen table where Kitty was digging through her purse. "Wait! Don't you think it's a little irrational to go buy boots this late on Christmas Eve?" Hyde tried to reason with her.

"No, I think it's irrational that you walk around like some hobo who doesn't have a loving, caring mother at home who bakes him cookies and makes sure he's warm!"

Kitty slammed a wad of bills into Hyde's palm and scurried back to the stove. Hyde stared down at the crumpled, green paper and thought of all those crazed, last minute shoppers that he would have to face at that demon place. He had to try to get out of this one last time.

"Okay, Mrs. Forman, how about…"

"No deals, Steven," Kitty interrupted. "Just get your butt down to that mall right now or no Rudolf cookies with chocolate icing for you."

Hyde shook his head and swore under his breath. Not a minute later, he was crunching through the snow again to make his way to the last place he wanted to be…

"Donna!" Jackie yelped in front of, at least, a hundred last minute shoppers. "_What_ are you doing?!"

"I'm sitting down, Jackie. We've been walking for two hours."

Disappointed in her mall-challenged friend, Jackie scoffed and sat down on the planter wall beside Donna. "Amateur."

"You know, Christmas is supposed to be the season of good will and charity, Jackie."

"Oh, I give, Donna. I gave that girl in the shoe store_ tons_ of advice."

"You told her she should try the ski shop next door."

"Well someone needed to tell her," Jackie snipped. "You could take some of that advice yourself, Sasquatch." Upon the offended glare Donna threw her, Jackie slouched and scooted closer, nudging her friend's shoulder with her own. "Oh, come on. You can't be mad at me. This is all your fault for waiting 'til the last second to shop… _You_ called _me_, remember? _I'm_ done with _my_ shopping."

Donna groaned at the dense crowd squeezing past them, realizing Jackie was right. "Well, trust me. I've learned my lesson," she confessed and looked over at her oldest friend. "So what'd you get everyone anyway?"

Jackie smiled. "Well… I got Fez six months worth of salsa lessons at the Y. I got Michael this ball he's been eyeing at the grocery store_and_ a sweater. For Eric…" Jackie rolled her eyes. "You know that stupid doll case he's been going on and on about?"

"The action figure case?"

"It's a doll case, Donna. Your boyfriend is a freak. Catch up."

"You got it for him, didn't you?" Donna smiled, seeing beyond the insult. "Aww, well look at you; you _do_ have the Christmas spirit, Charlie Brown," she cooed teasingly, attempting to embarrass the brunette, and succeeding as Jackie laughed through blood-filled cheeks. Donna laughed, too. "Okay. So keep going… what'd you get Hyde?"

Immediately, Jackie sneered at the question. "Steven?" Laughter followed. "Nothing! That jerk doesn't deserve Christmas presents."

"Jackie! You can't show up to the Formans' tomorrow with presents for everyone _but_ Hyde."

"And why not?"

"Good will and charity, Jackie."

Jackie's tightened her lips in anger. "Oh, you and your stupid feminist talk!"

"Jackie."

"Fine," she agreed reluctantly. "But I don't know what to get him. When we were dating, I would give him sexy things… in private, you know?" Grimacing, Jackie shook her head. "But I think that might be a little awkward now."

"Uh…_yeah_."

Jackie scoffed. "God, what do you get the man who married a stripper: a gift certificate to the whorehouse over on Taylor Ave?" she offered sardonically.

"Jackie," Donna scolded. "That's a women's shelter."

Jackie waved her off. "You say potato, Donna."

Sighing, both girls sat back. What to get Hyde.

After thinking on it a moment, Donna sat up. "Oh, I got it! Get him a… Wait. No, he'd eat that."

Jackie gasped and sat up as well. "Oh! Oh! How about a tr…" Quickly frowning, she shook her head. "No. He'd sell it for weed before the night was over."

They both sat back again.

"God, this sucks," Jackie grumbled. "The mall closes in fifteen mi…" Just then, though, she looked up, her eyes drawn to what might as well have been the Hope diamond sparkling in a festively-decorated store window. A beam of light shined gloriously on her discovery like a miracle from God, speaking to her. 'Buy us,' they said. 'Buy us.' "They're perfect," Jackie uttered.

Donna looked over. "What?"

"Nothing." Jackie stood up and shoved her bags at Donna. "I know what I'm gonna get."

"Well how long is this gonna take?"

"Just go. We have our own cars. I'll meet you at your house in an hour." Suddenly excited to purchase a gift for the very last person she wanted to get something for, Jackie squealed, clapped and took off through the crowd, yelling a faded, "I'll see you later, Donna!"

A moment later, Jackie entered the shoe store with her head held high in determination. She spotted the men's boots in the window and the pair she wanted to purchase instantly leapt out at her. Her gift was not only practical, but there was no way that Hyde would find some way to get rid of it. He'd been wearing the same boots that she bought him years ago, and they hadn't even had a relationship back then, even though Jackie had been trying. If anything, her gift to him would be the best present he would probably receive from anybody, and he might even start being friendly to her again because of her thoughtfulness.

Jackie skipped over to the window and picked up the tan colored boots. Her mind raced with thoughts of Hyde's reaction when he opened his present the next day.

_"Boots!" Hyde cooed, wistfully. "Just what I always wanted, Jackie. I'm sorry I left you for some lopsided skank with ten different kinds of VD. This present shows me what an insensitive, cocky jerk I've been and how I missed out on the best thing that has ever happened to me!"_

Jackie grinned to herself and walked up to the counter where a balding sales clerk waited.

"Can I help you, miss?" The sales clerk bellowed in a monotone voice.

"Yes, I would like these in a size 10, please."

"Sorry," the clerk shook his head. "I just gave away the last pair of size 10."

"What?!" Jackie screeched. "No, I _have_ to get these boots. They are _very_ important! Now you either march yourself in the back and find me another pair or show me who you sold them to, Cueball!"

The sales clerk rolled his eyes and pointed behind Jackie. "He's over there."

Jackie turned around to face the perpetrator only to find Steven Hyde sitting on one of the benches, struggling to get the very pair of boots she wanted to buy for him on his feet. Jackie gulped as her heart sank deep in her chest. _God!_ She screamed to herself, _He always has to ruin everything!_

Hyde gripped onto the back of the boot harder as he wiggled his foot down. He had forgotten how much of a pain in the ass these boots were when they were brand new. He finally felt his foot pop through and fit snuggly down inside when a pair of black, closed toe high heels that were attached to a great pair of legs tapped impatiently in front of him. Hyde looked up to see none other than Jackie Burkhart standing before him, hands on her hips, looking like she was ready to kill.

"What are you doing here?!" Jackie demanded, trying her best to keep her composure. But that never really worked out so much for her. Her blood began to boil as Hyde saw right through her and returned a smug grin as a reply.

"What does it look like? I'm buying a pair of boots."

Jackie scoffed, "Yeah well…You're stupid!"

Hyde raised an eyebrow at his ex who proceeded to cross her arms across her chest and seethe quietly to herself. He wasn't sure what was going on, but Jackie was definitely pissed that he was here, at the mall, buying boots.

"Answer me this, Jackie," Hyde leaned forward on his knees and stared at Jackie over his sunglasses. "What are _you_ doing here?"

"I'm…" A series of excuses flashed in Jackie's head, and like the expert liar she was, she instantly found the best choice. "I'm buying a pair of shoes for Donna."

Hyde looked around over his shoulder at the many racks of men's shoes. "Jackie, you're in a _men's_ shoe store."

"Yeah, well Donna has really big feet, Steven." Jackie reasoned while holding her hands out far apart, "I just figured it would be easier to actually come to a place that might have her size."

Just then, the balding clerk walked up to Jackie and Hyde, his bored face showing only a slight bit of annoyance. "Did you guys figure out who was going to buy the boots yet because the store is going to close really soon?"

"No!" Jackie barked. "Now wait over there until we're finished."

Jackie's stomach churned as she saw Hyde's cocky smile grow even bigger.

"So when did Donna start liking the same kind of boots I wear?" Hyde chuckled.

"Oh shut up, I'm not getting them for you anyways." Jackie shook her head.

"Well then who are you getting them for?" Hyde asked, loving every second of the torment.

"A friend." Jackie stuck her nose in the air. "A male friend. A male friend that might be a potential boyfriend actually, not that it's any of _your_ business."

Hyde held his hands up in the air defensively. "Well, by all means, don't let me stand in your way." He began slipping off the boots, trying to ignore the nagging pain of jealousy in his chest. "These are too small for me anyways. I think I might need a 10 ½."

Hyde handed the boots over to Jackie and put on his old, worn ones. They walked up to the counter together and Hyde said to the sales clerk who wore the same tired expression, "I'm gonna need the same pair but in a 10 ½."

"We don't have those in 10 ½."

"Oh, whatever," Jackie rolled her eyes. She was really getting fed up with this guy. "You know, we're the customers here and it's _your_ job to service us."

"Look," the clerk sighed. "I'm positive we don't have those in that size, but if you really want you can go in the back and look for them yourself."

"Maybe we will!"

"We will?" Hyde asked.

"Yes," Jackie nodded her head. "You do want those boots, don't you?"

Hyde thought back to Mrs. Forman and the seriousness in her voice when she ordered him to come down here. If he went back there without any boots, she would be giving him the guilt trip all night and he really wasn't in the mood for that. He also wasn't in the mood to go searching around in the back of some shoe store with Jackie, but at the moment, it seemed like the better option.

"Let's go," Hyde announced and followed Jackie to the back of the store, where they found a dimly lit room with rows and rows of shoe boxes. The heavy door closed behind them, and they slowly began to realize that actually finding the right pair might be harder than they anticipated.

"Where should we start?" Jackie asked, beginning to regret getting so adamant about finding the right size.

"I guess I'll start over here and you can start over there," Hyde pointed and the two split up to begin searching on opposite sides of the room.

After a few minutes of silence, Jackie spoke up, "Ew, who would even think about wearing these?"

"Hey Jackie," Hyde called after her. "How about we don't give commentary about every shoe we see."

"And how about you stop being a jerk for more than three minutes," Jackie snapped back.

"I'm a jerk? It was your idea to come back here in this shit hole in the first place."

"Well you didn't have to agree to come."

"Why would you have come back here if I didn't come?"

Jackie didn't have an immediate answer for that, and Hyde took full advantage of her silence.

"You really are getting those boots for me, aren't you?"

"No, I'm not! They're for my boyfriend!" Jackie began to yell.

"You don't _have_ a boyfriend," Hyde scoffed.

"Why do you care anyways, Steven?" Jackie opened up one of the shoe boxes roughly. "Do you want to try to get him to sleep with a bunch of girls too like you did with Fez?"

"I didn't do that." Hyde turned away and began searching angrily as well.

"HA! Whatever!"

"Well if he's anything like your last boyfriend, then I won't even bother, considering you have a thing for perverted foreigners that like touching women's hair."

"Well it's better than _your_ recent choice who strung dental floss together and called it underwear, all while using up Point Place's entire supply of penicillin."

Hyde gritted his teeth, trying his best to control his anger and not say the mean shit that was spinning through his head. After looking in embittered silence for another fifteen minutes, he finally found the pair of boots that looked exactly like the ones he wanted. He turned them over and saw 10 ½ on the sole.

"Hey, I found them," Hyde called to Jackie. Jackie scurried over to where Hyde was and started jumping with glee once she saw the size as well.

"Yes! I knew that clerk was just lazy and didn't know what he was talking about."

Hyde nodded his head and placed the box underneath his arm.

"Let's go rub it in his face," Hyde declared happily and began walking to the door. Jackie bounded behind him, still celebrating the fact that she was right as always.

Together, Jackie and Hyde walked out of the back room to a very empty and dark shoe store. The only sources of light were the ornaments on the miniature Christmas tree resting on the counter that reflected tiny sparkling flecks on the walls. All the other customers were gone and the dreary sales clerk was nowhere in sight. However, the worst part about it was the gate was down, meaning they were locked in.

"What the hell?!" Hyde shouted as he stomped over to the gate. He shook the bars, hoping that maybe there was some miniscule chance that it wasn't locked, but to his disappointment, the gate wouldn't even budge.

"Oh my god," Jackie gasped. "Are we locked in?"

Hyde rested his head on the bars and took two deep breaths before answering through clenched teeth. "What does it look like?"

Jackie groaned loudly and stomped her foot. "Oh my god! I can't believe this is happening. This is all _your_ fault, your know!"

"My fault?" Hyde turned around, appalled at her accusation, "How is this my fault?"

"Well if those size 10s would have actually fit your stupid feet, we wouldn't be in this mess! That's how!"

Smoke practically billowed out of Hyde's nostrils. "That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard! If anything, this is _your_ fault because it was _your_ idea to go look for these boots in the first place!"

"Ah!" Jackie huffed. "You know, you have a lot of nerve, Steven Hyde. I was just trying to be nice and get you a Christmas present, even though you completely don't deserve it!"

"Whatever." Hyde shook his head. "You were just at the mall like you always are because the only thing your cheerleader head can comprehend is shopping."

"But at least I was getting you something! I bet you haven't even considered getting me _anything!"_ Jackie retorted.

"You don't know that." Hyde crossed his arms and looked out through the gate.

Jackie's knitted eyebrows relaxed with momentary relief. "Wait. You got me a present?"

"Well, you'll never know because we're stuck in some stupid shoe store."

Jackie let out a muffled scream from deep in her throat and turned around to try and collect her thoughts. While she paced, Hyde began studying the gate. It did not take long for something to catch his eye. He leaned down and began fiddling with the lock when Jackie turned back around to release her wrath.

"You are the slimiest human being alive, you know that? I don't know why I even started dating you! We have absolutely nothing in common and you never once took my feelings into consideration during our entire relationship. You're just nothing but a…but a… dirty, pot smoking, paranoid criminal!"

The imprisoning gate flew up at the end of her sentence. Following, Hyde stood up and faced her with a smartass grin that was begging for Jackie to take her words back.

Jackie wasn't going to entertain his cockiness, though. She knew better than that. Instead she pranced off, saying, "The nearest exit is this way."

Hyde grabbed his boot box and followed her out. "You're welcome."

The further they traveled down the darkened upper-level causeway of the Point Place mall which was decorated with rows of silver and red tinsel, the more apparent it became to them that their predicament was more dire than originally perceived. Inside, Hyde began to panic, his pace quickening as visions of bitchy ex-girlfriends and theft charges danced in his head, but, of course, he stayed quiet. Jackie, on the other hand, handled her concerns with a much different approach.

"Whoa!"

Freaked, Hyde spun around. "What?!"

"That was _not_ on sale yesterday!"

Confused, Hyde stepped toward her. "What."

"You know, it just _figures_, too," Jackie griped further, slapping her hands on her hips as she stared meagerly into the ornamented window of her favorite clothing shop. "I wait two weeks, and that blond skank tells me that their not gonna…"

"Are you kidding me?!" Hyde shouted at her.

"I know, right!" Jackie scowled. "That bitch duped me."

Hyde's jaw tightened, his previous panic turning to anger as he grabbed her forearm. "We're going!"

"Ow! Hey! You know, you don't get to manhandle me like that, Steven! We're not dating anymore!"

Hyde shook his head. "I'm locked in this damn place on Christmas Eve because of your ditzy games and _you're_ freakin' shopping." He continued to drag her toward the way he had come in. "I should leave you here."

"Oh, please, you big crybaby," Jackie sneered. "I'm sure there's a way out of here. And I don't know what you're freaking out about; it's not like you have anywhere to be anyway."

"I could have somewhere to be," he responded curtly.

"Oh, yeah? Where?"

"Somewhere you're not"

Jackie feigned a catty laugh. "Nice try, Steven, but the fact is that you have no where better to be _than here_, stuck in the mall, with moi!"

Hyde scoffed. "Like you had somewhere better to be?" he covered with, furtively turning the conversation back on her. "What do you have, a hot date with your imaginary, boot-wearing, boyfriend?" As his sentence closed, Hyde stopped cold, realizing that every place of business around them was closed as well, including the entrance he had taken into this pit of hell: the JCPenny.

"Crap!"

Jackie grabbed the bars as Hyde finally let go of her. "Help! Help, you idiots! We're locked in!"

They waited there nearly five minutes, Jackie screaming in between breaths for someone, but to no answer. The same eventually went for Sears, May Company, Robinsons, the South side exit, the North exit by the Orange Julius and every one in between, all of which were covered in obnoxiously cheery Christmas garland.

It was official; they were locked in the freaking mall.

Frustrated, tired, and no longer speaking, Jackie and Hyde sat down against the gate to the Foot Locker. "Some criminal you are," Jackie muttered beneath her breath.

Hyde ignored her, choosing rather to lay his head back and contemplate the option of murder-suicide that Eric had so wisely proposed three years before. Beside him, Jackie swallowed down her thick saliva, her throat parched for liquid. On the other side of the glass partition that looked below to the bottom level was that Orange Julius. Lots of liquid there, Jackie knew. The only thing that separated her from the heavenly orange concoction that would wet her lips so wonderfully was a giant iron gate.

Of course, sitting beside her, breathing irregularly and plotting her torturous demise—she knew—were the keys to that gate: her ex-boyfriend and his depraved criminal mind.

Hopelessly setting down her pride, Jackie sighed. "_Ste_-ven," she drawled sweetly and poked out her bottom lip.

"No."

"But I'm thirsty," she pouted, noticing his ambivalence almost immediately. "I could die, you know."

Hyde raised an intrigued eyebrow to himself.

"Steven!" Jackie narrowed her eyes. "I know you're thirsty, too!"

Hyde noticed his dry tongue and scratchy throat as soon as she said something. He looked to the Orange Julius and saw its gate wasn't much different from the shoe store.

"Fine, you whiny baby." Hyde stood up and started walking. Jackie danced on her toes as she followed closely behind him. Once they got to the shop which was right in the middle of the mall, Hyde made a bee line for the gate. Jackie watched intently as Hyde worked his magic, shaking and poking at the lock with a small pin.

"You know, I never thought I'd say this, but I'm kind of glad you're from the under belly of society," Jackie happily nodded her head. "Sure you might be poor and wear ratty tee shirts, but what you lack in class, you make up for by using your deviance for good."

Hyde continued to fiddle with the lock, ignoring Jackie's own unique way of complimenting and insulting him at the same time. He felt the lock pop loose and opened up the gate.

"Knock yourself out." Hyde stepped out of the way for Jackie to walk in. He took notice of her sudden change in demeanor as she made her drink while humming to herself and nodding her head. He had forgotten how cute she looked when she wasn't constantly nagging him and bitching in his ear.

After both of them had made their drinks, they decided that with all the main exits chained closed and their padlocks near impossible for Hyde to pick, they were going to have to stay the night in the mall. They started heading for the furniture store to see if there were any comfortable beds to sleep on.

"You know, this actually might be kind of fun," Jackie said as she slurped at her drink.

"How can you consider spending the night in an abandoned mall fun?"

"Because the mall has everything, Steven," Jackie declared. "All of our basic necessities are here. Nourishment…" Jackie shook her Orange Julius cup. "A place to sleep," she pointed in the direction they were headed. "And jewelry!"

Hyde stopped sipping on his straw and turned his confused eyes on his ex. "Jackie, I really don't see how you need jewelry to survive."

Disenchanted, Jackie sighed to herself. "Duh, Steven. Haven't you ever heard that diamonds are a girl's best friend?" She shook her head. "That's where you and I have always differed. I'm smart and you aren't."

Hyde rolled his eyes. "I hardly see how you knowing the ins and outs of a stupid mall makes you smart."

"Because without me, Steven, you would be wandering around aimlessly without having the slightest clue where anything is."

Hyde took another sip of his drink, slurping it until it was completely gone. He bit the end of his straw as a sick and cynical idea sauntered into his head.

"You are right about one thing, Jackie. Malls really do having everything you need to survive for a while. Like in that movie Dawn of the Dead we saw."

Jackie tensed as she remembered the movie they had seen just the year before.

"You know," Hyde began as he looked around, "this mall kind of looks like that one."

"Okay!" Jackie raised her voice. "I know what you're doing and you can just stop it because it isn't working. The situation we're in right now is nothing like that disgusting movie."

Hyde smiled to himself. All he needed to do was plant the seed. "Whatever you say, babe."

They came upon a small department store which had some dressers just near the entrance. After Hyde unlocked its flimsy gate, they walked in and set down Hyde's shoe box next to Jackie's purse in one of the corners.

"Okay, I'm going to find some pajamas, and then we can figure out what we'll do from here," Jackie announced as she started walking off.

"Pajamas?" Hyde called after her, causing the brunette to stop and turn around. "Why can't you just sleep in what you're wearing?"

Jackie threw her head back and laughed as if what Hyde just asked was the most ridiculous thing she had ever heard. "In this?" Jackie gestured down to her outfit. "Puh-lease. I'm not a savage, Steven. I can't sleep in this blouse. It's silk! It would never be as stunning as it is right now _ever_ again."

With that, Jackie disappeared to the back of the store and Hyde opened his eyes wide and muttered, "Psycho," underneath his breath.

It wasn't two minutes later until Hyde heard the clicking of Jackie's heels scurrying back. She appeared in front of him with a pair of lavender pajamas in her arms and the saddest frown he had ever seen.

"What's up, Jackie? Did they not have any silk nighties or something?"

"No," Jackie groaned. "That isn't what I'm upset about, you jerk. I need you to come with me while I change."

Hyde lifted up his eyebrows in excitement and grinned widely at her. "Well, if you insist…"

Jackie slapped his chest hard. "I'm not talking about that! You scared me with all of that stupid zombie talk and now I'm too afraid to get changed by myself."

Hyde chuckled, possibly even more elated by the fact that he successfully scared her than by the free peep show he had earned himself.

"So, what, you want me to be on lookout to make sure that no flesh eating zombies get you while you change?" Hyde began poking Jackie in her sides as she squealed and tried to kick his shins so he would back off.

"Stop it!" Jackie shouted frantically and stomped her foot. "Just do what I say, okay?"

"Fine." Hyde followed Jackie towards the back where the dressing rooms stood.

"No trying to get a peek either!" Jackie ordered before she went in. "We're not dating anymore and you don't have naked privileges."

"I don't see why it matters anyways," Hyde slyly grinned at her. "I've seen you naked like a thousand times. All I have to do is close my eyes and there you are," he assured her, doing just that.

Jackie gasped, feeling suddenly exposed. "You stop it! Open your eyes right now!"

"Aw, yeah. You dropped your sponge," he groaned happily, nodding his pleasure. "Now you're bending over all _whorey_for me."

"Oh, you wish, Steven! Now open your stupid eyes so I can get dressed, you pervert," Jackie yelled at him as she disappeared into the darkness.

Hyde opened his eyes, laughing to himself. She was so easy to goad, he thought as he waited. On the other side, Jackie changed in the dressing room hallway, too afraid to actually go inside one of the rooms. Hyde waited for a few seconds until he knew Jackie was about halfway done and then ran around the corner, banging frantically on the wall. "Run Jackie! I see one of them coming!"

"Ahhhh!!!" Jackie's piercing scream bounced all around the store as she ran outside with her blouse halfway unbuttoned and the pajama bottoms barely over her butt.

Hyde couldn't contain himself once he took sight of her. He fell back against the wall and laughed so hard tiny tears started streaming from the corner of his eyes.

"Steven J. Hyde!" Jackie's shrill voice echoed in his ears. She pulled her pants up and marched over to where he was standing. "You're such a cruel person, you know that?"

"Oh come on." Hyde held out his arms as he continued to laugh. "I was only kidding."

Jackie's kept her sour eyes on him as she reared her foot back and kicked his shin as hard as she could.

"Ow!" Hyde yelped, doubling over and grabbing his leg.

"Now stop joking around!" Jackie stormed back into the changing area.

Hyde rubbed his shin and looked out into the store, wondering for the first time that night how he and Jackie really ended up in this mess. Since Eric's return and her break up with Fez, they hadn't seen too much of each other or hung out at all. They hadn't been friends since their break up almost a year and a half ago, and if he really put it into perspective, tonight was the first night they had been alone together for longer than fifteen minutes.

Just then, a beam of light shined into the entrance of the department store. Hyde froze in his spot and watched carefully as a security guard walked up to the dresser he and Jackie and set their stuff on. Paranoia wormed its way up Hyde's spine as thoughts of going to jail for breaking and entering spun through his mind. He was already on probation for trenching Old Man Krinsky's yard, not to mention he had a possession charge to his name. He didn't want to add this to the list which he would knew would happen because a cop would never believe that he and Jackie just got locked inside the mall.

"Jackie," Hyde whispered as loudly as possible without being noticed by the security guard who was still snooping.

"Cut it out, Steven. I'm not falling for one of your lame pranks again."

Hyde saw the security guard step away from the bed and turn on his heel in their direction. "Jackie! C'mere!"

"Oh my God. Now you're just coming onto me and this is not the time, Steven!"

The man was narrowing in on their position and Hyde knew what he had to do. "God damn it." Using the most basic of his Jackie knowledge, he decided to do the only thing that would guarantee her mouth disabled. Not wasting another second, Hyde breached the forbidden corner, grabbed his obstinate ex-girlfriend by the waist and sent both of their bodies diving beneath the first available clothes rack, quickly slapping his hand over her already active lips.

"Don't talk," he whispered against his own hand.

Squirming beneath him, Jackie grunted and growled and eventually bit him in the palm.

"Ah! Damn it."

"God, Steven! If you wanted to make out, all you had to do was ask. I'm bored, too!"

"What? No! There's a security guard coming. You need to shut the hell up."

"There is?" Jackie beamed and tried to sit up to see, obviously excited at the prospect of a rescue.

"No," Hyde stopped her and rested his weight back over her. "We can't let him see us."

"Why not? He can let us out of here."

"Yeah, like he's gonna let us out of here, Jackie. I have a record and we've already broken the locks of three stores and stolen stuff."

Jackie scoffed. "Maybe _you_ did."

Hidden in darkness, it was impossible to see the features of his face, but she could hear his aggravated sigh and sense the tension in the muscles of his arms, and it was then that it finally struck her that he was laying on top of her and that her hands were clutching his biceps. Between her legs, his weight settled by the pounded-inch and the full bulk of him began to hug her body. Breathing in and out as quietly as she could, Jackie slid her hands inward and down his chest to his sides, noting the pleasant differences a year made.

"Stop moving," he ordered.

Sighing, Jackie closed her eyes. "Fine."

Hyde rested his head on her shoulder and waited, listening and watching as the security guard waved his inquiring flashlight around. Between the fear of getting caught and the smell of her perfume, his stomach knotted and turned inside out. He had forgotten the warm, comforting smell that meant she was in the room, or, in the best of circumstances, half-dressed beneath him. Able to feel her curves and limbs move subtly against his, Hyde only prayed that he could keep his composure. To be sure, he raised his hips and then prayed some more.

"I think he's gone," Jackie eventually whispered, finding herself disappointed when he got up and helped her out from under the clothes rack. Hell if she knew why. He was so unworthy of her attention—the attraction, purely physical. She hadn't had sex in nearly a year. Contact with the washing mashing made her squirm these days, so when he grabbed her hand and stealthily walked her to the front of the store, yeah; her chest tingled.

At the front of the store, Jackie watched him grab their things. "Okay. What are we gonna do?" she asked.

Hyde shrugged. "I don't know. Find that furniture store?"

"With the," she swallowed, suddenly very thirsty again, "beds?"

Hyde froze, understanding the connotation of her stammer. "Yeah, that's probably not a good idea."

Jackie shook her head. "No… I mean, you felt that, right?"

Hyde grimaced, pissed that he knew exactly what she was talking about. "Crap." He looked around. "We need to get outta here."

"How, though? There's no way out!"

Hyde grabbed her hand and dragged her around a corner and into an exceptionally dark area of the store, mindful of the still wandering security guard on their tail. He steadied her by the waist. "If this had been Forman, or any of the rest of those sallies, this game would have already been over, but this is _you _and_ me_."

Jackie nodded, seeing where he was going with this. "And we're way better than them."

"Right," he affirmed. "And we're also something else."

Jackie frowned. "Better looking?"

"No…Well yeah, but…We're survivors, man. Orphans. We know how to take care of ourselves, and damn if we're gonna let some rent-a-cop with a night shift take us down! 'Cause I can't go back to prison, Jackie. I just can't!"

Her eyes thinning lasciviously, Jackie clutched his waist, too. "God, you're so hot when you're fighting the system."

Hyde scrunched his face in torment. There was something about the final words from a hot chick before combat, the short goodbye before taking a stand against the man that brought out the Bogey in him. So, he kissed her, deep and hard, and when they pulled away, they knew, if they were going to go down, they were going down together, fighting and causing a ruckus. It was just what the good-looking did.

"So…What are we gonna do?"

Hyde straightened his back, breathing deeply. "We're gonna steal his keys," he announced, sounding like a man of conviction, wrought with certainty and confidence.

Jackie smiled. "Oh, okay! So how are we gonna do that?"

"Uh…I don't know," he admitted shamefully. "But we need to distract him somehow."

"Wait, okay, so if we can get him distracted…"

"And we need to lure him to a certain place so I can lift the keys."

"Lured and distracted," Jackie frowned thoughtfully. "Alright... Do you know where that little stand is, in the center, where the mean lady sells all those crappy electronic trinkets?"

Hyde grimaced. "No."

Jackie groaned at his ignorance of her favorite place in the world. "Alright. What about that store with the candles and all those little Precious Moments statues?"

"Jackie, what the hell are you talking about? Before tonight, I hadn't been in this mall since I stuffed you in a closet with a wedding dress on."

Jackie's mouth fell. "Oh my God. Steven, that's it! The wedding shop."

Hyde smiled. "Hey, I know where that is!"

"Ok, well you know next door, that stereo store?"

"Yeah, Mrs. Forman got Forman's car stereo there."

"Okay… In between the two stores is a corridor to some maintenance rooms…" As Jackie spoke with lucidity and faith, her adept knowledge of their current prison became clear to Hyde. If there was a connoisseur of the mall, she was it, and he quickly realized that without her, he was screwed. As was she without him.

"Does that sound alright?" Jackie asked hesitantly.

"Hell yeah. It's perfect actually."

"Good," she smiled, taking in a deep breath as she grabbed their things. "Then let's go."

The harried flight through the mall that followed did little to curtail the flirtatious smiles that Jackie couldn't help but shoot back at Hyde. Making it worse were his returning glances, made with eyes that were entertaining the very same thoughts that were dirtying up _her_mind, too.

Jackie bit her bottom lip and blushed as her step turned into a saunter. She looked back again, noticing his grinning stare. "What?"

"I didn't say anything."

"Well stop looking at me like that," she uttered playfully, her shoulder rising to her chin as she glanced back.

Hyde smirked. "Well then you stop looking at me like _that."_

Jackie laughed as they approached the dress store and stopped. Clutched the gate, she pointed to her right at a small, hidden corridor between the two stores they had discussed. "Right here."

"You want me to hide in_ there_?" Hyde frowned, slightly confused. He had imagined something much different. "Jackie, there's no way he's gonna walk up right against this wall."

"No, Steven, just think about it…He's alone. It's dark. The stereos start blaring. You think he's just going to walk on up to see what's going on?" Jackie asked, leading his answer.

"He's gonna sneak up," Hyde nodded thoughtfully, "against the wall." It was a good plan, his brain told him, but there was one problem. "But how are _you _gonna get out the store?"

Jackie grinned. "These stores each have an exit into that corridor…It's how I snuck back into the wedding shop all those times I got kicked out... and anyway, by the time he gets here, I'll be right behind _you_ ."

Impressed, Hyde looked her over. He'd forgotten how crafty she could be, and how she was always peeling back her cold facade to surprise him. And it didn't help that this place, where white frilly dresses hung tauntingly in the window, reminded him of her.

Ready to escape this haunted joint, Hyde nodded. "Let's do it…"

Exactly seven minutes later, Jackie placed her shaking hands on Hyde's back and closed her eyes. "Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God..."

"Shh. Get ready to run," she heard him order. "And don't look back, no matter what happens." Jackie nodded, forgetting that he couldn't see her. The music was so loud it was making her insides shake. Adrenaline surged through her veins until it felt like her heart was going to burst. She just wanted to get the hell away from this mall. The very thought of which pained her to no end; this place was her paradise, but she had her limits.

In front of her, Hyde stiffened and held his breath. It was time, he realized, hearing the faint thud of combat boots making contact with the ground. Hyde first noticed the dark figure maybe six steps before it would reach their position, but it wasn't against the wall like they had hope. In fact, the security guard was a good three feet from it. Several options, including abandonment the mission, ran through Hyde's mind while nervous hands clutched at his back. He _had_ to get those keys. So, when the guard evened with the corridor, Hyde made a decision and stuck out his foot.

A loud thud followed, making Jackie open her eyes.

"Run!" Hyde demanded a few seconds later and grabbed her hand. Before her mind could register what was happening, though, an exhilarating wind began to cool her face. They were running, quickly but stealthily, away from the noise and commotion they had caused, away with each other; running until the wind took on the cold, crisp smell of winter in Point Place.

Free at last, Jackie looked up and smiled, breathing a visible sigh of relief with Hyde. Above them, a crescent moon hung in a velvet black sky, calming their racing hearts as they were reminded that they were in the real world again where their relationship was nonexistent and they were barely even friends. Their cars sat alone in the parking lot, just a few lanes from each other waiting to be driven back to their apartments where nobody would be waiting for them.

As they ran across the asphalt, the cold stinging their cheeks, their fears subsiding, both tried to figure out a way to keep this night going without sounding like a damn jackass or, worse, a clingy, lonely jackass. They both had had fun and the kiss they shared still tingled against their lips reminding them that the feelings they had been ignoring had never really gone away.

Since Jackie's car was closer, they both stopped together once upon reaching it. Jackie laughed as she tried to catch her breath, "Wow, that was exciting!"

Hyde nodded his head, panting for air as well, his new boots still in hand.

"So…" Jackie began pulling her keys out of her purse. "Did you really have somewhere to be tonight?"

"No," Hyde shook his head, thankful that Jackie had always been the one to make the first move. "Why?"

"It's just," Jackie hesitated, second guessing what she was about to admit. She laughed nervously, forcing herself to continue, hoping that he wouldn't reject her, "I haven't spent Christmas Eve alone in a long time, not since I was a kid. I don't know… I mean… we had fun tonight, right?"

Hyde smiled down at her. "Well… I guess it was no worse than bowling."

Jackie's heart swelled in her chest and she shook her head as she laughed her nervousness away. "You wanna go watch movies at my place?"

"Sure."

Requiring not another word, Jackie and Hyde both got into their cars and met each other once again at Jackie's apartment, both very aware that they would not be watching any movies, and_ very, very_ aware of how the night would end, but still so blind to what this night would bring them tomorrow, or the next day, or the next; in two words: their _future_…

Christmas Eve 1981

The Present

For the second time in fifteen minutes, Hyde slipped off his old, slop-covered boots, but this time, having learned his lesson, he set them down on the kitchen floor by the side door. Giving them some decent consideration, he decided that Jackie was right. They were old and battered and his only reason for holding onto them wanted them gone. They weren't worth the fight anymore. They had done their job and carried him home, and now it was time to let them go.

Making his way through the house, Hyde grabbed himself a glass of water and sat down on the couch, remembering to use a coaster as he set the glass down on the coffee table. He pulled off his socks, making sure not to put the damp pair on the couch, and sat back to relax. He knew that Jackie was working her butt off to give them a nice Christmas in their first place together and so he decided he would be patient today. He would try. After all, he loved the hell out of that chick, no matter how much he wanted to kill her sometimes.

"Steven," he heard come quietly from behind him and turned his head to see Jackie standing sheepishly behind the couch. Slowly, she walked toward him, easily climbing onto his lap before she wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him tightly. "I'm sorry, baby."

Hyde let out a breath. "I don't wanna fight with you."

"Me neither," Jackie concurred, giving him a squeeze. "It's Christmas, _and_ our one year anniversary... I didn't mean what I said about Christmas sex."

Relieved to hear it, Hyde sat Jackie up and pushed her hair from her face. "I'll throw my boots away. Okay?"

"No," Jackie replied quickly, shaking her head. "No. I was thinking about it, and if it wasn't for those grungy old stupid boots…and Mrs. Forman and Donna," she giggled. "…we wouldn't be here together."

Hyde frowned thoughtfully. "How about I just keep them off your new rug then."

"Okay," Jackie smiled and kissed his lips. "Good idea."

Just then, the doorbell rang, Jackie jumped off of Hyde's lap and the world started up again. In the next moments, Hyde answered the front door, his new bride ran back into the kitchen to grab her hors d'oeuvres, and My Boots sat, watching silently, reprieved to live another day with Steven and his chick…

Phew! I thought I was a goner there, for sure, this time.

So that's it. That's my story. What do you think?

Alright, so I may not be the sexiest pair of boots in the world anymore, or the most practical on a snowy night, but how many of those guys can say that they saved their owner from the tyrannical clutches of 'the man' and helped him impress and win back his chick, all in the same night? How many can say that one minute they sat in a store window, ogled over by a cynical young man and a hopeful girl with eyes that could stop the earth from spinning, and the next, found themselves crucial to a relationship that the world had long given up on? Not many, my friends. And so here I sit and watch my two favorite people in the world, looking happy, as they have every night since the night that I, My Boots, risked myself, and one lonely Christmas, for the sake of the fifty-seven and a half joyful ones still yet to come…

Happily Holidays

The End


End file.
